goodbye

You are a hundred miles away
from my ever-present thoughts and dreams.
You are not there when my eyes are closed,
my midnight whisperings aren't what they seem.
I do not hear your silvered voice
and it doesn't cause a secret smile
imagining what you might have said
with every passing twilit mile.
This is not running away from you.
We both knew I was going anyway;
leaving on that dusk-strewn open road
it matters not what the pity filled faces say.
You did not pre-empt my departure.
I do not feel I am betrayed
though you should have come along with me
and should definitely not be laid
where I can feel you but not see you,
and know you are there without touch,
laid in the arms of anothers' dreams;
an inhuman fire that burnt just too much.
I watched you draw away from me,
a vacant look in yellowing eyes
she enveloped you in boundless arms
so that I could only watch my loves' demise.
And now, I see your peaceful face
through tears I said I wouldn't cry
you dream on of lives you lost through her,
I dream of you and dreams that died.